I come from a Brahmin family and we are very particular in observing every tradition of our caste. We are the priests in the temples and are the agents of
uncountable gods and goddesses. We are considered as the incarnations of these gods and so people who did not bow down before us would not go to heaven (Moksha). People are afraid of us and we are able to order them and people obey every kind of moral and immoral order we passed. We have a hold in every aspect of their personal lives, including matrimonial, betrothal, espousing, the first union of bride and bride groom etc., We utilise every occasion for our own benefits and lusts. The superstitious people would never utter a single word against us and we earned gold, lands and treasures.
I was very proud of addressing myself as the grandson of “PARAVASTHU
CHINNAYASURI” one of the most famous Telugu poets. He wrote the famous books “NEETICHANDRIKA” & “MITRABEDHAM” in which there are moral stories.
We used to go to river early in the morning and worship the sun (which I later came to know was created by God). At that time we used to utter the words which are derived from one of our ethics (Vedas): “PAPOHAM” (I am a sinner). “PAPATMA” (My spirit is sinful). “PAPAKARMAHA” (My deeds are sinful). “PAPASAMBHAVA” (I was born in sin). We used to utter these words without considering the meaning of the words for we thought about our selves that we are holyand sinless. I was surprised to think that I was a sinner.
As I went through our Vedas I found in one of them this statement:
“SARWA PAPA PARIHARO RAKTHA PROKSHANAM AVASHYAM THAD RAKTHA PARAMATMENA PONYADANA BALIYAGAM”
(For the expiation (or remission) of every sin there should be blood shed and that blood should belong to a divine person who is holy and without any sin or curse). On reading these words I started searching all our religious books and Vedas but no god of ours was sinless. Brahma, whom we called the creator, had lusty desire against the woman whom he had created. For that the woman cursed him and he lost one of his three heads. All the ten incarnations of Vishnu Murthy (another god) are because of curses, for one or another reason. Some of his ten incarnations were: pig, fish, tortoise, lion in the shape of a man etc. I wondered if there was not such a holy god who’s blood was worthy to be shed. In one of our ethics, I read that a virgin would bring forth a son who is sinless and worthy to shed his holy blood for the forgiveness of sins. But I found nobody in our books who is sinless and with out a blemish. I was very disappointed about this. I also consulted our great so-called wise elders, who could not explain this to me. Later I came I read in our books that one would come to rule the whole world. But I had been seeking answers for my unsolved questions.
One day I was going past a Christian church to observe some of my ritual function. It was the Christmas season, so the preaching was relevant.
Suddenly I heard the words:
BEHOLD A VIRGIN SHALL BE WITH A CHILD AND SHALL BRING
FORTH A SON ………,. I stopped abruptly. I could not step forward. I was surprised, afraid, bewildered and every thing. “Is the answer there in the books of Christians”. My heart throbbed to rush forward and meet the preachers, but my religion, traditions, caste, society etc , strictly prohibited me to go forward because we hate Christians. They belong to the lowest community and are untouchables. They should not enter our society, their presence defiles the atmosphere. Christians should not drink water from our wells, they are at our feet. They are our labourers, shoemakers (cobblers) who should eat our leavings. Christians are not allowed to live together with the people of higher community, and so they live in huts at the outskirts of villages. Jesus Christ is called by us as the god of lower race. If I went to the preacher, my own people would shun me from our society, so that I would not bring defilement to my own people. I could not venture to go near the preachers, but called for him. He came running to me with his folded hands. After I asked him a few questions I asked him to give me a Bible. I brought the Bible to my home and hid it in a secret place to avoid the sight of any of our people.
After midnight’s I got up and read the Bible and started reading it very carefully with the help of an oil lamp on a pretext that I would be sleeping in temple house only. So nobody could find out what I was doing. I began to find many answers to my questions.
The Bible said: “All have sinned and come short of the Glory of God”. So I understood that I was a sinner and I had no right to make people bow down before me. I protested to my elders and sternly restricted people in kneeling down before me. I began to understood about the real deity without any sin. In the Christian Gospel according to John c8 v46 Jesus Christ challenged this world “Can any of you prove me guilty of sin?”. It is written in 1 Timothy c1v5 that “Jesus Christ came in to the world to save sinners….”. and I found many other scriptures like that. I came to know about the real God and I found the answers to my questions in the Bible. Things which our Vedas and religious books could not answer. I confessed my sins at the feet of the Lord Jesus Christ. I received Jesus as my personal saviour and Lord. Sadly my own people became my enemies. But I am sure they will come to know the truth and pave their way to eternity.
What about you dear reader ? Will you choose Jesus or mere religion ? Heaven or Hell ?. There is no compulsion, it is your own choice, light or darkness. If you feel as if you are at the end of your rope – try Jesus.
Source: http://rajeev15.sulekha.com/blog/post/2006/01/testimony-of-paravasthu-surya-narayana.htm: accessed from the link on: 19th March 2010